Moments. . .
Laughing and sharing stories with friends over wine.Rounding the ICU with one of the gods of ___________.
Sweating over an impossible a-line in a 80 year old atherosclerotic lady.
Straining to pull a 36 pound bow over and over without dropping my elbow.
These are the moments that the memories of the past and the REGRET leave me, replace by the joy of camaraderie, the excitement of discovery, and the intensity of 100% focus and utter exhaustion.
Yet, life is not made up of only such moments. The darkness still creeps in from time to time, usually in the dead of night. I am alone, faced with my own conscience, old memories, and crippling self doubt. But I like to remind myself one more moment--as I step out of the hospital after a hard call, suddenly and momentarily paralyzed by the rarest of phenomenom in SF, a sunny day. Beyond the park, the towers of Golden Gate Bridge are poking over the perpetual clouds to the north. With a some imagination, the streets of the Sunset district give away to the rolling waves of Ocean Beach to the west. The world is new again and everything seems possible if only I am brave enough.
posted by hedgehog @ 1:19 AM
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